Welcome!    Please explore to prepare or repair a great happy holy marriage.

HERE YOU WILL FIND TWO SETS OF PRE-VATICAN II MARRIAGE PREPARATION COURSES.

The first is nine lessons

Book 1 of 9 Marriage Instructions here.

First Book for Marriage Prep: Courtship

Books 2-9 way down below, easy to download.

(titled "Book pdf" 2-9)

The second set is 15 lessons, also with quizzes at the end of each lesson.

Welcome to my storage page!

I invite you to look around and get to know the ways to prepare a good Marriage or repair a failing one.

Your prayers open the door, and God is waiting patiently 

on the other side of that door, at all times, 

in all situations, to join with you. 

Many blessings to you,

Fr Kevin

Latest Sunday Sermon:

Sermons and latest great stuff

see bottom of this page, way down below to find lots more to download.

Great Book for sale: Intro below

Husband and Wife

The Joys, Sorrows and Glories of Married Life

By the late Father Paul A. Wickens

With three things my spirit is pleased, which are approved before God and men: The concord of brethren, and the love of neighbors, and man and wife that agree well together.” —Ecclesiasticus 25:1-2

“And God created man to his own image: to the image of God he created him: male and female he created them. And God blessed them, saying: Increase and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it.” —Genesis 1:27-28

“Have you not read, that he who made man from the beginning, made them male and female? And he said: For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife, and they two shall be in one flesh.” —Matthew 19:4-5

Sudden Death

 

Marriage Preparation Course

Be careful about the modesty of the wedding dress! 

Be careful for the Bridesmaids dresses as well.

Pre-Vatican II marriage course in 15 lessons with Quizzes

Last five lessons zipped up below

 Table of Contents:

Course Brochure

Introduction

THE NUPTIAL BLESSING

May the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob be with you, and may He fulfill His blessing in you: that you may see your children’s children even to the third and fourth generation, and thereafter may you have life everlasting, by the grace of Our Lord Jesus Christ, who with the Father and the Holy Ghost liveth and reigneth, God forever and ever. Amen. —From the Nuptial Mass of the Traditional Roman Liturgy

PUBLISHER’S PREFACE

The title, or even the subtitle, of this book might well be The Catholic View of Marriage because, in a capsule form, that is what the book is about. Yes, “The Catholic View of Marriage,” for certainly the Catholic Church has a number of fundamental and far-reaching teachings on the nature and purpose of marriage, the role of husband and wife within a Catholic marriage and the place of the children—such that Catholic marriage, properly practiced, differs in a number of ways from the practices current in non-sacramental marriages and even from those of marriages between baptized non-Catholic Christians. The duties and obligations of each spouse toward the other within a Catholic marriage, the marital morality they must observe, the proper relationship of the woman to the man regarding headship within the marriage, the responsibility of that headship on the man, the need for the woman to be primarily homemaker and mother, the understood indissolubility of marriage—all these Catholic norms (and others) only help to promote true harmony and increased love between the spouses and a sense of security for the children. In effect, these Catholic norms help produce happy marriages. Scores of Catholic books on marriage have been written in the last 75 years, proving that Catholic marriage is indeed a fertile subject for Catholic writers. And of all such books that I know about, the most telling title ever given any of them was Why Catholic Marriage Is Different. That was probably far from the best book on Catholic marriage, but it probably had the best title by far, because in those five simple words it announces to the reader that Catholic marriage is indeed different from non-Catholic marriage. And Fr. Paul Wickens’ excellent little book, Husband and Wife, will amply show the reader why. In brief, why? Because, in brief, Catholic marriage is illuminated by the Divine Revelation of Jesus Christ, the God-Man, who came to “give testimony to the truth.” (John 18:37). Man can discern with his unaided reason the principal lineaments of marriage, but Original Sin and his own personal sins help blind him to the exact truth about marriage and help weaken his will to accept that truth, even when he sees it clearly. But with Divine Revelation shedding its light upon the institution of marriage, “everyone that is of the truth” (John 18:37) and willing to accept God’s word will see marriage for what it truly is and what it is truly supposed to be. Catholic marriage, in short, is based upon true principles laid down by Almighty God. And if man will but follow and adhere to these principles, then marriages will be happy, harmonious, fruitful in graces and in children, and will promote the eternal salvation of the spouses and their children and foster the well-being of the Church and of society. In reading this book, therefore, one should rid his mind of all secular notions of marriage and open it to the divine truth regarding this God-given institution in which the majority of human beings are called to work out their salvation.

Thomas A. Nelson

February 27, 1999

St. Gabriel of The Sorrowful Mother

Strangers in Many Ways

At wedding receptions one often hears a song originally recorded by “The Carpenters” entitled “For All We Know”:

Love, look at the two of us,

Strangers in many ways.

Let’s take a lifetime to say,

“I knew you well . . .”

Yes! Most couples at the time of their marriage are still actually “strangers in many ways.” But they need not worry! By God’s grace, they will grow together in love, understanding and holiness. The purpose of this small book is to help married people understand each other better, to help them with some of the common problems most couples encounter in marriage. It is not intended to be complete, by any means, but it is at least a “good start” to arriving at an understanding of each other and of the state of life they have entered into, what its purpose is and how God expects them to work out their eternal salvation within its realm. The information and advice contained in this book are really the product of many priests, many counselors and many married couples. Over a period of thirty-five years, especially through the outlines given to us at (pre-Vatican II) Cana Conferences, we were able to accumulate copious notes on various aspects of the state of marriage, and consequently we are able to pass along the accumulated wisdom of many people on this complex but so very important subject. Our heartfelt thanks go out to those wonderful Catholic people—some of them now deceased—who through their ideas and advice made this little book possible.

Fr. Paul A. Wickens

June 13, 1992

Feast of St. Anthony of Padua

See "Wickens" document below for first chapter

Excellent Draft Texts of Vatican II

(The one "On The Sexual Order" is attached below for download)

In the years leading up to the Second Vatican Council, Pope John XXIII entrusted the preparation of the documents that would be discussed by the Council to a Preparatory Commission, headed by the venerable Cardinal Alfredo Ottaviani. The Preparatory Commission ended up drafting a total of nine schemas on a variety of topics. It was these schemas that would be rejected by the Council Fathers are excessively rigid, condemnatory in tone, and too "Scholastic" in their style. The majority of the documents were rejected in favor of what have gone on to become the sixteen documents of Vatican II. Until recently, we in the English speaking world had no way to assess the alleged inferiority of Ottaviani's original schemas; we had to simply take the word of the Council Fathers and periti. Thankfully, however, in 2012 a priest of Marquette University, Fr. Joseph A. Komonchak, laboriously translated five of the nine schemas into English. We are happy to link Fr. Komonchak's excellent translations below.

Five of the nine schemas are available, with expansive footnotes and helpful commentary by Fr. Komonochak. The original Vatican II schemas available in English are: 

 

On the Sources of Revelation (De fontibus revelationis)

In reading these original schemas, one is struck by their clarity, their directness, and relative to the subsequent conciliar documents, their brevity. It is also interesting to see in what ways the content of these documents are notably different from the documents that were eventually promulgated. For example, "On the Sources of Revelation" states very plainly that there are two sources of revelation which constitute a single deposit of faith; Dei Verbum, on the other, is emphatic that there is but one source of revelation which is passed on in two modes of transmission. 

The source material is interesting as well. An examination of the footnotes of the discarded schemas reveals an abundant number of citations from Pascendi, Mortalium Animos, the Syllabus and even the anti-Modernist oath, none of which are cited in the 1992 Catechism of the Catholic Church, for example.

The tone is markedly different; instead of the humble "searching for truth" [1] that we note in the conciliar documents, the original schemas lucidly and authoritatively proclaim the truth, as well as about the errors which pervert it. De fontibus revelationis, subject to so much scorn by the Council Fathers, issues several formal condemnations. In order to see the difference in tone between the two sets of documents, consider the first as passage from the schema "On the Christian Moral Order", paragraph 6:

"[The Church] grieves, however, that many people are transgressing the divine law, more from weakness than from wickedness, though rarely without grave guilt. It notes with great horror that errors are being spread everywhere, errors that open the way to perdition and close the gate of salvation. There are those who deny a personal God and so deprive the natural law of its foundation; there are those who, repudiating the mission of Christ, reject the law of the Gospel; there are those who rely only on human principles in explaining the moral order and therefore rob it of its genuine and ultimate obligation and sanction...Their impiety and impudence reach such a point that they attempt to assault heaven and to remove God himself from the midst. With notorious wickedness and equal foolishness they are not afraid to state that there is no supreme, most wise and most provident God distinct from the universe; there are those who maintain that the moral law is subject to changes and to evolution even in fundamental matters..."

Now compare this with a parallel passage from Gaudium et Spes chapter 21, also dealing with atheism:

"The Church calls for the active liberty of believers to build up in this world God's temple too. She courteously invites atheists to examine the Gospel of Christ with an open mind." 

When the Council got underway, the progressive Council Fathers saw the schemas of Ottaviani as an obstacle to their program of reform. Cardinal Bea, one of the more influential Cardinals and a favorite of Pope John XXIII, explained to his progressive colleagues:

"We must help the Holy Father achieve his goals for the Council, the ones he expresses in his radio messages and in his exhortations. These are not the same as those of the schemas, either because the Theological Commission, which directs them, is closed to the world and to ideas of peace, justice, and unity, or because of the division of the work and a lack of co-ordination. They've made room for everything except the Holy Spirit." [2]

Thus, these schemas, which were 'closed to the world', were replaced with what we currently have, and the defects of which we are all well aware. As they were never adopted, these schemas have no conciliar authority; but in reading them, one cannot help but contemplating the council that might have been. Archbishop Lefebvre said they represent the Universal Ordinary Magisterium of the Church.

We do not know when and if the other four schemas will be translated by Fr. Komonochak, but we will post them here if they become available.

NOTES 

[1] This phrase comes from Amerio, Romano (1996). Iota Unum: A Study of Changes in the Catholic Church in the XXth Century

[2]  Fouilloux, Vatican II commence (Catholic Univ. of Louvain, 1993), pg. 72, note 56

See below to download heaps of good documents!

Happy Hunting....and save your marriage!

Help for couples in trouble:

http://www.maritalhealing.com/conflicts.php

 

Great Catholic Booklets:

http://pamphlets.org.au/cts-pamphlets/9-austraila/164-politeness-in-the-pews.html

 

Free Catholic audio Books:

http://catholic-books.blogspot.com/

 

Marriage Prayer

 

Oh dearest Mother, perfect spouse of the Holy Ghost, we entrust our marriage to your Immaculate Heart. Cover us with you mantle. Purify our love in the fire of your love for your Son, and, once purified, offer it to Him and never let us stray from Him. Help us to love each other through and for Him. 

 

In times of adversity protect us and comfort us. In times of comfort remind us that all that is good comes from God. Help us to be selfless, patient and understanding, seeking to give more than receive. Help us to be the perfect companions and helpmates for each other along the way to heaven, and to raise many little souls for eternal happiness with God.

 

Protect us from Satan and the world, which want to reduce our love to selfishness and tear us from each other and from the arms of your Son. Above all, let our love for your Son grow daily, until the day when, together, we come home to rest in His heart for all eternity. 

 

Last five lessons and quizzes are found at the very bottom, attached as zip files. They are called "wedding Lessons and Quizzes no 11-15. These are meant for the last month before wedding.

On going Marriage Guidance

   Mp3 Files  

FOR USE IN SSPX MATRIMONY RETREATS:

Bandcamp Audio

21077 Quarry Hill Road,

Winona, MN 55987

bandcamp@stasaudio.org

(507)453-5760

Restoration of Christian Culture

 

The origins of the compulsive use of pornography

In clinical experience the most common emotional and character conflicts which influence this difficulty are:

·         Selfishness

·         Loneliness and sadness

·         Marital conflicts with a controlling, angry, critical, selfish, emotionally distant or negative spouse

·         Confidence weaknesses

·         Excessive sense of responsibility with lack of balance in life

·         Poor body image

·         Social isolation

·         Mistrust and anxiety in relationships

·         Excessive anger

·         Guilt and shame

·         Lack of self-giving to others

·         Difficulty in receiving love

·         Disordered priorities

·         Excessive sense of independence

·         Boredom with contraceptive sex

·         Lack of acceptance by peers, particularly in adolescents and in the adolescent stage of development

·         Lack of sense of fulfillment

 

Damage to marital love

Pornography harms marriages and families in numerous ways including:

·         a belief that fantasy is better than authentic love

·         growth in selfishness - the major enemy of marital love

·         failure to understand and appreciate the beauty and sacredness of marital love

·         lack of refinement in self-giving to the romantic aspect of marriage, to the marital friendship and to the intimate relationship

·         Diminished communication with one's spouse with harm to the marital friendship

·         Damage to the wife's ability to trust and then to to experience pleasure with her husband which upsets him

·         severe sadness, anger, mistrust and insecurity in the victim spouse

·         harm to marital intimacy

·         disordered view of beauty, goodness and sexuality

·         increased vulnerability to adultery

·         increased risk for marital separation and divorce

·         weakened spiritual life.

 

Warning signs of pornography use in marriage

·         neglect of the marital friendship

·         neglect of the romantic aspect of the marriage

·         loss of interest in the intimate relationship

·         increased tendency to isolate

·         increased irritability

·         decrease in positive, loving communication

·         increased viewing of pornography in the home

 

Response to pornography use by offended spouse

·         describe the betrayal pain that is identical to that of marital infidelity of sadness, anger, fear/mistrust and insecurity/loss of confidence

·         attempt to do so without excessive anger which is only possibly by a process of forgiveness

·         give a correction and demand change

·         insist that he know himself, work to overcome the conflict and meet with a third party as a couple

·         challenge spouse to be loyal to the marital vows to be true to and to honor.

 

Damage to young men from pornography

·         involvement in a fantasy world that undermines the ability to relate to young women in a healthy way

·         interferes with the development of a healthy personality

·         harms the ability to understand and want to make a loving commitment in marriage

·         fosters the hook-up culture

·         results in sexual obesity

·         can lead to severe loneliness, depression, weak confidence and social anxiety.